Friday, August 01, 2008

Fat'n Happy Time

Okay not so fat and getting a little antsy to start working out again. I've recovered from Lake Placid and have got to spend a little more time focused on work and the family. Time to put work back up on the shelf again and get back in shape! :-)
I've re-upped for Lake Placid again next year. I've also booked my lodging. The family is coming with me. You're hearing it here now: I'm going to qualify for Hawaii. In retrospect I think I subconsciously sabotaged my chances this year because I had serious doubts about being able to afford the trip. Sure I have those concerns for next year as well, but I've also got a year to figure it out.
Racing has become more of a job and less of a hobby. While I do it far less than I used to, there are now logistics, budgets, etc... oh yes and more than a little training. When it all comes together like it did in LP, though, it really is satisfying. It's way more satisfying than my job, even when my job is going well, and that's a point which I think few employers understand. I recently talked to a CEO of a small company over coffee and he said he thought work should slot in 2nd after family: sorry dude, too high. If I was told that I would lose my job if I went to Lake Placid or Hawaii for a week for a race, I'd be looking for a new job. I wish I could explain the empowerment I feel in the rest of my life following a good race. When I composed my race report after 2003 I remember thinking that while I don't believe the race, my first Ironman, changed me, it was this incredible affirmation of who I was or at least who I thought I was. Emotionally I was a train wreck going into that race. I remember sulking in the rain (it rained non-stop that June) while I trained. I remember crying on runs, "what if I can't do it? What if all those things I tell myself (about being special, talented, etc...) are bullshit?" I was sure if I didn't finish I'd be broken.

I struggled mightily during the race.

I finished.

5 years later my life is soooo different, but it all started during the Ironman in Lake Placid. From the moment I knew I was going to finish the clouds in my mind and on my soul lifted and I knew the meaning of life, my life anyway.
One thing:
Okay, I guess that's two things!